What if a Child Refuses to Live With One Parent in Maryland?

In Charles County, Maryland divorce cases, the divorce court judge makes the ultimate decision concerning child custody. That is, the judge decides with whom the children live whether custody is sole or some form of shared custody. The legal standard is the “best interests of the child,” which basically means what form of custody will lead to the best upbringing for the child.

Maryland divorce court judges WILL take into consideration the wishes and desires of the child. However, other factors are likely to be more important, such as parental finances and resources, location of primary residence in relation to schools, friends and extended family members, parental work schedules, parental wishes, etc.

But what happens if a child adamantly refuses to live with the custodial parent? What is to be done? In this article, the Maryland Child Custody lawyers here at the Law Office of Robert Castro offer some answers. We are Charles County, MD, family law attorneys with offices in Waldorf, Maryland. Call us at (301) 870-1200or use our contact page.

Is it common for a child to refuse to live with a custodial parent?

Yes, but usually, it is something temporary. It is not uncommon for a child to get angry and demand to “go live” with the other parent. This probably happens at least once in a Maryland divorce custody case. There is some argument with the custodial parent, and the child shouts something like, “I hate you, and I want to go live with Dad (or with Mom).” Usually, these sorts of emotional storms settle down, and things return to normal, but what if they do not?

Steps to take

If the desire to “live with the other parent” is persistent, several steps should be taken. First, efforts need to be taken to determine WHY the child wants to “live with the other parent.” If the problem is something like abuse, neglect, parental criminal behavior, etc., then, likely, matters will become serious and, ultimately, will involve the Maryland divorce court. A petition to modify custody arrangements may become necessary.

On the other hand, if the reasons are less serious and more based on the feelings of the child, then more discussions are needed. In many cases, “switching parents” is not an option. The “other” parent may not be able to have the child live with them for reasons that have nothing to do with love and affection. The “other” parent may not have the living space for full-time custody or may have a work schedule that will not permit that type of custody. There may be other “blocking” issues like the need to change schools, relocating across town or to another city, etc. Explaining why “switching parents” is not an option will often resolve the problem.

If the child’s recalcitrance still persists, then the next step is to involve the Maryland divorce court. The judge may be able to explain the situation to the child and, ultimately, may just tell the child that “this is the way it has to be.”

Does Age Matter?

Yes. As a child gets older, Maryland divorce court judges will be more inclined to consider their desires with respect to custody. But, still, in the end, custody decisions are based on the “best interests of the child,” even if those are determined to be different from what the child wants.

Contact Waldorf, Maryland Family Law and Child Custody Lawyer Robert Castro Today

This article has been provided by the Law Office of Robert Castro. For more information or questions, contact our office to speak to an experienced Maryland family law and divorce lawyer at (301) 870-1200. We are Waldorf, MD, Family Law lawyers. Our address is